Performance Alliance Blog

Any and All

2010-03-11T14:40:00Z

Sometimes I find people think some time is enough time. They have this misplaced sense that if they do something once in awhile it will lead them to where they want to go. Contrast that thinking to world class achievement on any level be that athletics, show business, business, personal development...whatever. World class achievers don't do what they do just some times. They practice and apply their fundamentals consistently over time. They maintain the beat, if you will, always!

Let's look at my point slightly differently. To do so let's build the discussion around two words: any and all.

If you think you can get to where you want to go in life anytime, you will be disappointed for all time. You have to convert your thinking in the immediate and present time! Now, in other words! Think this way. You don't have any time to waste time. In fact, you have to apply yourself to the fundamentals for achieving what you want all of the time at anytime not just sometime.

Time out!

Times up! Go do what you have to do all of the time. You will have the best of time.

Choice or Chance?

2010-03-09T13:52:00Z

Interesting question in the title especially considering what it refers to. In my writings, I'm almost always focused on trying to help people reach out to all the potential they can realize in their lives. As I have said many times, life is not about retiring. It is about constantly aspiring!

What do you aspire to? What do you want most out of your time in this life? I'm here to tell you achieving whatever it is regarding your answers to those questions is embodied in how you react to the two words in the title of this article.

Ya' see, I believe some people make powerful choices in their life while others wait for chance to strike them with good fortune. Chance don't get it in my book. By it's very nature and to be redundant chance is "chancy," at best! Why leave something as important as our life experiences to chance? Pardon my bluntness, but I think doing that is absolutely stupid!

Here's a better approach in my opinion. Think about it this way. Making a choice allows you to have a chance. Leaving your life to chance allows for little choice. Which is going to be for you: choice or chance?

Leadership In A Word

2010-03-07T15:38:00Z

I can remember more than once in my life someone testing my view on leadership during employment interviews or whatever. I think I even remember being tested in a college philosophy class on my concept of what leadership meant. One thing I even more clearly remember from those days is I wasn't sure of my definition of great leadership but I definitely knew when I was experiencing it. I could feel it and see it but not necessarily put it into words.

Not so today for me. My experiences over my life have put the concept of great leadership into very clear focus. So clearly that I believe great leadership can be summarized in one word. The word is inspire.

I absolutely believe great leaders don't assert their will on people. They inspire people to want to follow the vision and will of the leader.

Look at all of the truly great leaders in history. The leaders who positively impacted the world, at large. In a single word, their key to positive, world changing leadership was they could "inspire" others to follow in mass and with hearts in a synchronous beat. Now, that's leadership in a word.

Count Them!

2010-03-05T14:10:00Z

You've heard it before but you're about to hear it again. Why? Because too many of us forget too quickly. We move on with our lives and things tend to evolve into a blur. The fog in our memory rolls in and we almost can't see a thing.

The blur or fog to which I am referring has to do with clearly seeing and appreciating all the good things in our lives. Sometimes we get so mired in our momentary misery over something or someone we forget how good things really are. I mean...come on! Look at all the devastation of people's lives all over the world from famine, war, genocide, natural disasters, and political greed. Are things really that bad for you?

I say, count your blessings each and every day. Give thanks for the fact you are alive, kicking and able to change things, if you need to. Some people in this world absolutely don't have a choice. And, by the way, your power of choice is your greatest blessing. Count on it!

Toxic Twosome

2010-03-03T14:37:00Z

The word toxic just sounds bad, doesn't it? I mean the ring of the word throws off really negative vibes for me. It conjures in my mind the worst in everything. It leaves me wary and defensive. I don't know if that's true for you but hear me out on my point.

One single word definition of toxic is: "poisonous." Now, if that doesn't make you wary, defensive or protective, I don't know what would! Toxic seems bad...period.

So, here's my point about the concept of the title, Toxic Twosome. One of the twosome is the toxic waste the human race produces. The second of the twosome is the toxicity of some people. You know what they look and sound like. In general, they live with a scowl on their face and a growl in their voice. They're human beings and for that alone we should respect their right to live their lives. But, that doesn't mean we have to be poisoned by their negativity and dumped unceremoniously onto their slag heap of misery.

No! I believe toxic people are like toxic waste. They both have to be contained to prevent devastating pollution to our environment. It's up to each of us to work hard at that containment so our lives are "green" with hope and opportunity.

Dwell Swell

2010-03-01T14:00:00Z

Please pardon the alliterative title for this posting but there is a method to my madness. Frankly, I think you will find the reason behind my method is swell once you read the following comments.

Dwell can be used in the context of where you reside or in the context of where you are directing your focus or attention. For purposes of our discussion, I'm not using the word dwell relative to where you live physically. I'm using it relative to where you live mentally. Is your mental focus or attention tending to be one of worry or one of peace of mind and, just generally, a positive focus?

Where you dwell in your mind is where you live your heart. If you dwell incessantly on the negatives in your life, your heart will be heavy and hurting. And, you will tend to languish in self-pity and malaise.

On the other hand if you train yourself to dwell on the bright side of things, your heart will lighten and swell with a sense of well being. Your lighter heart will lift you into the actions you need to take whatever the price.

So, let's get back to the title. I want you to dwell on the brighter side of life. Think good. In other words, dwell swell! You will feel swell and, as I said, your heart will swell with life. Well...was my method swell?

Sorry...I got a little carried away!

Magnify Your Life

2010-02-27T16:31:00Z

Remember back in the day when you were in school and more particularly in biology class? In every biology class I ever attended, there was a microscope available. Not only was it available but it was necessary to understand the details of many of the biological topics of discussion in the class.

And, so it is in your life. You've got to constantly put yourself and your efforts under the microscope. You' have to get a magnified picture of the situation so you can understand what's happening and why.

As suggested by my biology class metaphor, we need to use a magnifying glass to get a clear picture of the minutest details of something. My suggestion for acting on the metaphor is you must use self discipline to magnify the minute aspects of your life. With that clearer picture you can move forward toward achieving your life's desires.

To magnify my point even more, clarity in planning begets certainty in results.

Nothing Equals Zero

2010-02-25T15:07:00Z

We hear it talked about a lot. The potential for this or that. He or she has great potential. The potential is enormous...and on and on!

My point is potential means nothing, potentially. Sound redundant? Not really and here's why. Let's take your potential for great success in life as an example for our discussion.

Success as a potential in your life doesn't equal actually achieving it. It means it's out there for you to make the choice to pay the necessary price to attain it. But, you must pay that price...period! Let me restate my point to make it absolutely clear. Your potential equals zero...means nothing...unless you constantly work toward it and realize it fully.

So, you see potential equals zero. It's the working toward realizing your full potential that adds up to something powerful and meaningful in your life. Do you want to add up to something or equal zero? Potentially, it's your choice!

In Hot Pursuit

2010-02-23T14:16:00Z

We all should spend our lives in hot pursuit of something. It could be gold medals at the Olympics or it could be peace of mind. Heck, it could be a million things...like, maybe a million dollars, for instance. Whatever! The point is life is a pursuit not a place to rest and recuperate...that comes at the end.

That said, whatever your pursuit, you need to accept one simple fact, if you are going to ultimately have a truly successful pursuit. Are you ready? Here it is! The difference between excellence and perfection is one must be achieved while pursuing the other.

Short and simple but hot thought. Pursue it!

Your Honor

2010-02-21T14:12:00Z

Okay, let's go off on what seems to be a tangent, at least as it relates to the title of this post. To do that, I have a question for you. Do you trust your perception of people or the circumstances around you?

Here's why your answer to that question is so important. The fact is your perception should be the reality. In other words, your skill at objectivity should be so honed that you are not looking at people or things with the proverbial rose colored glasses on. It's your perception! Make it the best you can so you can react to people or circumstances in totally accurate and appropriate ways.

Another point about this whole discussion. With objectivity, emotions don't cloud things as much and you can better use your innate intelligence to deal with things. If you react to people and circumstances with intelligence, your perception will be on the mark and reactions appropriate.

But, here's the challenge. The key to making your perception truly the reality more often is objectivity, as I said previously. So, how do you wring emotions out of your perception and drive objectivity. In short, don't react...enact. Enact a highly developed skill for listening with both your eyes and ears to what is going on around you. If you listen with clear and absolute focus, your perception will bring into "high definition" the actual picture of the situation or the people.

With a high definition picture, honor your perception. It makes dealing with people and circumstances so much simpler. Bet you thought I would never get around to the relevance of the title for these thoughts.

Good Song

2010-02-19T16:09:00Z

Several years ago there was a song entitled, Don't Worry Be Happy, performed by Bobby McFerrin. It was a light-hearted little ditty with a very powerful message throughout. Just an excerpt to make my point: "In every life we have some trouble... When you worry you make it double...Don't worry, be happy..."

The song had a wonderful lilt to it and just made you want to be happy. But, a happy life shouldn't require a lilting, little song to help you maintain a positive outlook and achieve happiness. I believe it is a matter of personal self discipline.

Think about it this way. If you would prefer to be happy, recognize achieving it is only a choice away. When you make "happy" your choice, "unhappy" does not exist. When you make "happy" your choice, life takes on a whole new glow. There's a lilt in your step rather than just in a cute, little ditty.

Make the choice as suggested by the song. "Don't worry be happy!"

Apology Not Necessary

2010-02-17T15:05:00Z

My post today has to do with a quirk many of us exhibit when receiving a compliment of one sort or another. You've either been there personally or seen someone else act in the manner I'm about to describe. See if this description doesn't resonate with you.

You're engaged in a conversation in either a business or social setting. Four or five people are discussing the days events or whatever. All of sudden a point is made that clearly defines what a great job was done by someone in the group or how they accomplished some amazing feat...it could be praise for almost anything. Anyway, the recipient goes into an "ahh shucks mode." They look down or away from the members of the group and a slight (or major) flush comes to their cheeks. It's apparent to everybody the person receiving the accolade is very uncomfortable and then that person says something like: "Oh, it was nothing." Or, "Heck, anybody could do that." Or my pet peeve, "It was nothing. I just got lucky."

My question is, why do people act that way when receiving a compliment or accolade of some sort? People like to give other people recognition and their intent is not to embarrass someone. When that is the reaction the person or people giving the recognition feel badly. It takes away from the quality of the moment for everyone included in the discussion.

Whenever you are in a situation where you are receiving some sort of recognition train yourself to feel that an apology is not necessary. Acknowledge the recognition with a heartfelt expression of thanks. Something like..."Thank you." Let your thank you be a thank you and nothing more. Don't feel you have to add anything else. Be humble and thankful...period. Again, an apology is not necessary!

Is To

2010-02-15T19:47:00Z

The title of this article relates to the comparison of two or more things. For example: Rust is to the natural color of iron what orange is to gray. Get the idea?

Now, to the relevant point for you. Passion is to life what love is to human relationships. Love energizes and drives lasting relationships. Passion energizes and drives consistent achievement throughout your life.

So, what is the key to living your life with passion? I believe the "master" key is--in all things do what you truly love. Yes, sometimes, to put yourself in a position to do what you love to do you have to jump through some painful hoops. So be it. Think ahead to the reward not the immediate pain. Passion for that ultimate reward is what drives you through the pain.

Find both...passion and love...and you have found a life of plenty.

The Basics

2010-02-13T17:15:00Z

The keys to a life well lived are embodied in the word "basics." I sincerely don't think it is any more complicated then that. Here's why.

The explanation lies in converting the word, basics, into an acronym.

B elieve in yourself. If you don't, nobody else will. A life well lived is truly a team effort but successful teams can't exist without belief in one another. The foundation for believing in others is born of a belief in one's self.
A ttitude of abundance. In my opinion, life isn't about scratching a lonely path through a desert of poverty and despair. It is more about a team effort of creating more for everybody.
S ensitivity to others. A life well lived is impossible when trampling on the spirit and souls of others. Lift up rather than beat down.
I ntellectual development daily. Truly living life requires a constantly growing body of knowledge to better understand how to live.
C onditioning physically daily. A weak body is a prematurely dying body and doesn't have the energy to fully live.
S piritual growth daily. Define your higher power in whatever way works for you. That connection on a spiritual level increases your power to live.

Those are the basics. Live by them and live well.

The Difference

2010-02-11T15:00:00Z

It's not very complicated. Some people can't and some people won't. It's that simple, as far as I'm concerned.

What do you want out of your life? To have the greatest peace of mind and sense of a life well lived, with your last flickering thought at the end of your life, what are all the things you will want to have been, done or have had? Thinking and acting on all three of those areas constantly throughout your life is an absolute key.

But, here's the catch. The difference between a person who can't and another who won't is one person could, if helped, and the other person wouldn't, regardless. Which are you?

If you want the greatest peace of mind. If you want to have a deep sense of a life well lived. You have to know the difference between an attitude of can't and one of won't.

There is no shame in thinking you can't achieve something as long as you are willing to figure out why you can't and then go do what is necessary to overcome the obstacle. Usually, people who can't do something are in that state because they don't know enough about how to do it. With a positive approach, education and training is the answer.

On the other hand, a person who won't can't be helped. The mindset is so closed and negative that nothing or nobody can help them. It's as simple as that.

Again, I ask you. Which are you? There's a big difference in the outcome of your life depending on your answer.

Great Moments

2010-02-06T20:59:00Z

You know what they're like. Those moments in your life where everything seems to come together in an instant of perfection. Moments that give you a total, utter and absolute sense of satisfaction. Those moments in life that you want to bottle and keep on the shelf of your experiences forever. Wonderful moments!

Wouldn't it be wonderful if you could have each moment of your life be great? I believe you can. More than anything, creating consistently great moments in your life starts with your attitude. Great moments usually are not born of a negative frame of reference. Negativity begets moments of misery...period!

So, here's the key to creating great moments in your life, in my opinion. A great moment is born from innumerable great moments in the past. A great moment in the present is the seed to an untold number of great moments in the future. In other words, consistent, positive moments of mind create an unbroken string of great moments in your life experiences.

Isn't that great? Each moment is fully in your control to create.

What Drives Them?

2010-02-04T15:30:00Z

Interesting question but, then you ask, What's the "Them" part? What I'm talking about are your dreams...your aspirations in life.

Ever notice some people have dreams and never seem to realize them and others do reach their wildest dreams. What's the difference? Well, it's a two-part answer near as I can tell.

One part driving the reaching of dreams comes from inside. It is the overwhelming, emotional connection to the goal or the dream. Without that deep connection nothing will be achieved, probably. This is because most dreams come with a price that must be paid. If you don't have that emotional connection you will not be willing to pay the price.

The second part comes from an external perspective. Here I'm talking about what your emotional connection to your dream drives you to actually do to pay the price. There won't be much drive if the emotion is not deep and, thus the dream languishes in a state of you wishing for it rather than actually achieving it. Not a good feeling.

So, to summarize what I've been saying in one sentence it's this: Dreams are driven from the internal but come true through work on the external...that's what drives them.

Energize!

2010-02-02T13:55:00Z

So here you are! Dragging yourself around on a daily basis. No energy. No motivation. No sense of purpose. No enthusiasm for life. Wondering what it is all about and why you should even care. Believing that something is missing in your life. Thinking, if you knew how to fix it you would.

I believe the solutions for those of us in a malaise are embodied in a simple but powerful acronym. Here it is:

Exercise your body
Nutritious diet
Exercise your mind
Renew your spirituality
Generate and grow personal relationships
Yak to yourself using positive affirmations

As you can see, the acronym is ENERGY.

A quick summary of the point regarding each phrase making up the acronym is in order. Let's face it. Your body is like your car. Without proper maintenance your car isn't going anywhere sooner or later because it will suffer a physical breakdown. So will your body suffer a physical breakdown and low energy when it is out of shape due to improper maintenance. In short, move it or lose it!

Your car isn't going to go anywhere if you don't keep the tank full of gas. Neither are you, if you don't fuel your body with proper nutrition so you keep it running smoothly and full of energy.

Your car isn't going anywhere if the computer controlling it's various functions fails. Neither are you if your mind is dulled and listless through lack of use.

To keep up the pace that a full and meaningful life requires you must have a belief in something bigger than you. Call that something whatever you want but it's essence connects with the spirituality of your very soul and keeps you moving faithfully forward.

As human beings all the science would confirm that with very few, extreme examples we are gregarious by nature. We need to care about other people and they to care about us and that caring brings us together in an energizing community.

Finally, you have to affirm your self-worth through talking to yourself in positive ways. Achieving a full life doesn't come through negative energy. Negative energy shuts life down. Positive energy lights life up.

If you want to energize your life, you have to exercise continuous self-discipline in each of the areas of the acronym ENERGY. I energetically urge you to do so!

How It Happens

2010-01-31T16:10:00Z

So, you have this desire for something to happen in your life...an event or an achievement of some sort. You invest a lot of time thinking about it and wondering when it's going to happen for you. You wish it would just happen!

I've used the following quote before in my writings. It's from an unknown author but it is very germane to where I'm going in this article. "Wishing consumes as much energy as planning." Or, in my words, what's supposed to happen will happen as long as you exercise some self-disciplined will to make it happen.

I believe everything happens for a reason and has its own time for happening. But, that doesn't mean any of us should just sit around and "wait for the inevitable to happen." We have to take control of those things that we can and drive as much of the process as possible. But, then not tense up when it doesn't happen at the time we want it to. If you've done the best you can to make an achievement or event happen in your life, relax. It's inevitable that it will happen and, more importantly, that's how it happens.

Deductive Reasoning

2010-01-29T13:10:00Z

So, you say you want more out of your life in all aspects. You want no limits except as you set them. In short, you want it all! Well, good luck.

Many of us never get it all for one simple reason. The reason is the "all about me attitude" too many of us exhibit on a daily basis. Me, me, me can't be over-emphasized in our lives.

Well, if "me" wants all life has to offer, it's got to be about "you." In other words, deductive reasoning says, if you want to succeed in life and "have it all" you have to add value for others. You've got to subtract self-centeredness and multiply the well being of others.

How did I deduce that? Through reasoning. That reasoning led me to observe others who truly "have it all" in life. In every way, they don't deduct from...they add to the lives of everyone around them. Whaddaya say? Why not deduce that you are going to give it a try?

Up or Down

2010-01-26T14:45:00Z

I'm always struck by how people speak and act but especially as it relates to whether they seem to have a positive or negative bent in actions and tone. It further seems to me that we only go around once in life (as far as we scientifically know) and so we might as well get the most out of it. Those two points made brings me to a continuing personal conundrum. Why do some people orient their lives to the negative?

From my perspective, thinking negatively all the time is wasting precious time. Negativity sucks the life out of life! How can anyone get the most out of life's wonders by limiting their options through negative thinking? In my opinion, they can't.

So, what to do? I think it is an up or down kind of thing. All of us get down at times in life. It's inevitable and understandable because life is a series of ups and downs. The key is what we say and do during those ups and downs.

I believe the ultimate point of leverage on this whole topic is this: Down can be up, if we think uplifting thoughts and do uplifting, by the bootstraps, things.

It Can Be Frustrating

2010-01-24T16:25:00Z

Frustrate is an interesting word. According to one dictionary's succinct definition it means: To prevent from accomplishing a purpose or fulfilling a desire. And so, in life we can run into frustrating obstacles that seemingly are preventing us from achieving whatever it is that we want.

No great revelation in anything I've said, I'm sure. But, here's the point! Whenever you're being frustrated by life's little bumps in the road turn things around in your mind. Don't just give up at the first sign of an obstacle in your path.

Answer the following question for yourself whenever confronted with adversity. Do you see opportunity in frustration or frustration in opportunity? Clearly, if you can train and discipline yourself to see opportunity in frustration you will inevitably achieve more of what you want out of life.

I know. It can be frustrating to actually have to exercise some self discipline and put forth more intense effort.

Past, Present, Future

2010-01-20T19:10:00Z

Each of the three words in the above title would suggest distinctly different times in the continuum of time. Seems to make sense to me. How about you?

Here's the challenge when thinking that way about the continuum of our lives. A successful past portends a successful future as long as you leverage the opportunities of the present. In other words, don't give up on experiencing the powerful events in your present because you are so focused on dwelling on the negatives of the past or achieving something out in the future.

The last thing you want to happen in trying to live a fulfilling life is to reach the end with the wrong question in mind. The question? "Why didn't I stop, focus and enjoy more frequently during each precious minute of my life?"

Rather than having the above question on your mind, how about doing the things necessary to have the following thought. "Now, that my life is over I'm glad I lived every minute of it."

Your Path

2010-01-18T20:26:00Z

If you're like most of us, you spend some time, at least once in a while, thinking about the future course of your life. It's natural. We all wonder where life's twists and turns will take us...What will be the good, the bad and the ugly? Especially the ugly!

I ask, Why dwell on it? Why not control it as best you can? As the old saying goes, "Wishing consumes as much energy as planning." Here's the trick, though. Don't try to define your path in the future so clearly that you miss living today.

In other words, your life planning should be relatively simple in method and almost on automatic pilot in practice. The key to achieving simplicity is to think in terms of what you want to achieve personally, professionally and spiritually. Develop simple action plans to achieve those things you want that include a step-by-step process (that's the automatic pilot part) for getting there. The driver behind each action plan is a well defined goal statement that clearly states why you want to achieve those things. As Zig Ziglar says: "You have to have a great big why."

Here's an action plan template you might like to use:

2010 GOALS

ACTION PLAN

Focus Area—

Goal:

ACCOUNTABILITY TIME SCHEDULE RESOURCES NEEDED

Action Steps	Primary	Others	Start	Finish

Water

2010-01-13T22:09:00Z

Okay, with the title of this post I could go a lot of directions. We could talk about the water management policies of the western states in the U.S. Nah! How about the importance of the cycle of water for the entire earthly ecosystem? Nah! Then, there's the debate about whether bottled water is really coming from the pure sources noted on the various brand labels. Nah!

I know...let's talk about water and it's relationship to your purpose in life. Now, that sounds like we're getting somewhere! Right? Please say, Yes! Very quickly, then, let me try to grab your attention concerning my point.

As succinctly as I can put it: Water is to life what passion is to purpose. To put that another way: Water your purpose with passion and the river of your life will be overflowing with great and good things.

Inspire Your Year

2010-01-07T16:20:00Z

Here we are at the beginning of another launch of a new year in each of our lives. What do you think it's going to be like? How do you think it will turn out for you? Will you live up to your New Years Resolutions? At the end of the year will you look back at a year when you achieved your goals? Will the year be all that you hoped it would be?

Well, who knows at this point? The only certainty is this: Your answers to the above questions will directly relate to whether you sustained an inspired approach to everything you do in this new year. You can't hope for a positive experience this year. You have to be inspired to do all the things necessary to create a year of great success and fulfillment.

So, how do you do that? How do you inspire yourself throughout the year? First, you have to believe in yourself. To do that simply recognize that you are unique in all this world. There is nobody else like you. That alone should give you the inspiration to recognize your value as a human being and, therefore, a belief in who you are and that you are good for something.

That said, it is the "something" that now becomes important. Each "something" related to your ultimate answers to the above questions has to inspire you. It has to touch you at the core of your soul. In short, you must be emotionally and powerfully attached to each "something" so you are driven to do what it takes.

That...and only that...will help you to inspire your year.

A Decade Done and One Begun

2009-12-20T17:11:00Z

86,400. Interesting number but what's its relevance to you? Well, as we approach the end of another year and decade it seems to become even more meaningful to many people. On the other hand, to achieve at your highest level in life the number has to be more consistently relevant throughout each year. Why? Because the number represents the number of seconds in each of your days in this life.  You can't stop those seconds.  You can't put them in a bank and save them.  You have to have the knowledge and skills as to how to use them most wisely, now.

At 12:00 a.m., January 1, 2010, the only thing that turns back, so to speak, is the calendar to the first day of the year and the new decade. While everything starts over at 1/1/10, everything else concerning time continues its inexorable march forward. What will you have done to close out the year and the decade from a time management perspective, as well as begin the process of organizing yourself to manage those daily 86,400 seconds even more effectively and efficiently in 2010 and beyond?

May I suggest the first step to a more productive use of your time would be the establishing of clear goals in each of three critical areas: Spiritual, Personal and Professional.   Each goal you establish has to be very specific as to what achieving the goal will look like. You have to create a goal that you can measure so that you know how you are progressing toward it throughout the year. Furthermore, each goal should be something you can realistically achieve, yet also allow for you to stretch a little beyond what you have ever achieved before. Probably most importantly each goal has to be relevant to you in a deeply emotional way. Finally, each goal must have a specific target date by which time you will have achieved it.

Having clearly defined your goals, you must then allocate the time to work toward each. You should segment the steps to each goal into bite-sized pieces of time which allows you to incrementally work to the accomplishment of each goal. Each bite-sized piece of time has allocated to it the "To Do's" necessary to successfully complete each step.

Simple, huh? But...hard, to be sure, because the above outlined process requires a passionate commitment to discipline yourself to follow your plan.

Time talks to you everyday and whispers, "I'm fleeting!" That's if you aren't exercising your ability to discipline yourself in time's use. On the other hand, were you to be more disciplined and follow the outlined process time's talk to you would be, "I'm moving inexorably forward with you while your goals and dreams are being manifested."  The former example of time talk is disconcerting and unsettling because you feel time and all that it offers you slipping away. The latter example of time talk creates a sense of control and piece of mind. How would you prefer time to talk to you in the future?

What Happened?

2009-11-30T16:54:00Z

It's November 30, 2009! That means there is one month left to this year but even more astonishing left to this DECADE! Where did it go? What happened?

Here's the more important question: What did you accomplish over the last year or decade? If you can't answer that question with a plethora of positive observations about your course in life, then do the following.

Take a brief inventory of your successes and failures over the past year and/or decade.
Leverage the positives and minimize the negatives.
Don't dwell on either...what's done is done!
Vow to move forward into the new decade and year with a sense of focus and belief in the future.
Build yourself a life plan that will make sure your reflections at the end of the next year and/or decade leave you fulfilled.
Enjoy! You've got this one life to live to its fullest.

Make it happen! Don't ask, What happened?

"Nuthin' really."

2009-11-19T19:27:00Z

Ever been there? Either you've said it or you've heard someone else say it. It's the non-answer given too many times by too many people. I believe it's the answer given by a person who really is not engaged in a dynamic pursuit of maximizing life's opportunities. They're doing "nuthin' really" with their lives. They're in hot pursuit of nuthin' but disappointment, in my opinion.

Why would someone even want to spend a minute doing "nuthin' really." Life is too precious to waste. It's a gift meant to be unwrapped for the entire time we are on this earth. It's not meant to be wasted in one, long, rumpled state of disinterest!

Now, I'm not saying all of us shouldn't have some down-time once in a while. But, quality down-time isn't about doing "nuthin' really." It's about doing whatever it is we enjoy and cherish as a pastime. It's about getting away from the rushed, work-a-day world and creating whatever we want out of the time we have off. Is it sleeping, reading, golf, skiing, playing a musical instrument, watching TV, being with family, working out, whatever? None of those have to be "nuthin' really" activities.

"Nuthin really" is about an attitude of disinterest. A slovenly, moping, useless, morass of misery brought about by negativity. "Nuthin'" about that "really" sounds enjoyable.

Pull yourself out of the morass, if you're one of those "nuthin' really" people. "Nuthin' really" is a state of mind, an attitude, that can be changed just like anything else in our lives. It takes a self-disciplined flip of the switch in your mind from the negative to the positive. There is "nuthin' really" more important for you to do in this life but to start right now to flip that switch.

Come to the bright side of life. There's "really nuthin'" more to a dynamic life of fulfillment than that.

No Plan...No Success!

2009-11-09T23:46:00Z

If you're going to be a success at living your life, it won't come as the result of a surprise. Rather, it will be because you focused on what success would look like for you. Using the resulting vision of success you planned for it. With that vision and plan as your driving force you then, achieved it.

The fact is your skill at and your commitment to planning will determine your destiny. Think about it this way...around and around you go and where you are you better know. Otherwise, you get confused and lost. The answer to not getting lost on your road to success in life is planning.

Your planning has to be driven by emotionally meaningful goals. What do I mean by "emotionally meaningful goals?" Well, what else do you want? If you have a big enough emotional reason why you want it, then you will get it. In other words, when it comes to a truly, emotionally meaningful goal; you have to be able to figuratively see it, feel it , taste it, smell it and hear it before you have it, if you're going to ultimately get it.

A detailed plan that includes well defined, emotionally driven goals and the action steps to provide the road map to those goals, can give you the certainty many of us want in our lives. A bright future of personal success is best defined and assured through a written plan and effective execution of the steps in that plan.

Yes...true success in life doesn't come as a surprise! Here's a resource for getting your life plan started and for minimizing the surprises in your life.

Affirming or Spurning

2009-11-02T10:19:00Z

Think about the way you react to the interactions and occurrences in your daily life. Is your overwhelming state of mind one that is positive or negative? Are you a person that takes a "spurning" attitude in life? Are most interactions with others a chore and you reject the other person's opinions or desire to communicate with you? In other words, do you spurn other's attempts at interaction with you? How about how you deal with everyday events in your life? Are those events a chore, too, and make you wish they would just go away and make life easier, as a consequence? In other words, do you spurn those events and just want to remain in the status quo?

Well, I've got news for you! If you yearn to spurn, then you won't learn. If you won't learn, then everything in life is a burden. Change is frightening. New relationships are limited if not impossible. Opportunities for personal growth disappear. In short, life becomes an existence rather than a invigorating experience.

So, what to do? I say turn your thinking around from spurning to affirming. By that I mean, train yourself to take a positive outlook on interactions and life's occurrences. Either behavior is learned so you can change to either one with a disciplined effort.

But, then you ask, Why? Simple. You have one opportunity to get life right. I didn't say perfect. I said right. To me, "right" means you took advantage of all the opportunities life has to offer. You didn't reject them outright. You weighed each opportunity in light of a positive focus and chose to act accordingly. Doing so makes life a series of growth experiences rather than a burden of living out your years and slipping negatively into eternity.

Affirm this by repeating it first thing when you get up in the morning and the last thing at night: I am a good person who chooses to accept life and all it offers with the positive belief that everything happens for a reason and it's a good one.

And, ultimately it will be!

A Leading Life

2009-10-26T14:53:00Z

Seth Godin has it right in his book, Tribes. The essence of his message is we all have a responsibility to lead in some way. There's the old cliche, "Lead, follow or get the hell out of the way!" In Godin's opinion, none of us should perceive ourselves as always following and certainly not needing to get out of the way. Rather, pick up your share of the leadership load and the world in total will be a better place.

I couldn't agree more. The fact is every one of us has aspects of our lives that requires us to lead the way. It could be as it relates to our family, career, social interaction, health, financial management and a myriad of other things. We, individually, own the decision making process and the related action steps that need to be taken. If anyone of us doesn't follow-through on these "micro-leading" responsibilities, the entire system is weakened in some way. In short, the whole is only as good as the sum of it parts.

So what is a person to do in assuming their leadership responsibilities, however they may be defined? I suggest you answer the following questions to come up with the answer.

What is it about your life that inspires you to do whatever it takes to lead yourself and others to success?
Are you positive and bursting with hope about the direction of your life and do other people feel it?
How strongly are you connected to your thoughts and feelings and those of the people around you?
Are you compassionate toward yourself and others?
Are you continously aware of your impact on yourself and others?

Your answers to the above questions will put definition to how well you are doing in assuming your leadership responsibilities. If you like what you see, then congratulations. In contrast, if your answers are not satisfying in some way then define what you need to do to fix it and do it!

In summary, it is not in a vacuum that you "lead" your life. You have a "lead" role in your life and in the lives of all those with whom you come in contact. Don't get out of the way. Don't follow. Lead!

To Put...

2009-10-19T17:54:00Z

The title of this entry does not say, "Two Putt," as in golf. It says, "To Put," as in doing something. Those two words, "to put," can have a dramatic impact on your life, depending on how they are being used. Some examples might be of help in giving you a clue to the direction I'm taking here.

So, for example you could say something like, "I need 'to put' some order to my closet." Another example might be, "I need 'to put' some action behind my annual planning." One more example, just for clarity. You might say, "I need 'to put' away my lawnmower and then I have 'to put' some gas in my snowblower.

Sorry! The devil made me come up with that last example. I live in beautiful southwest Florida and I've been watching the current weather reports from up north. Snow and cold is never a pretty sight but in mid-October? I probably need "to put" a cork in it and move on to my point!

As I said, the words, "to put," connote action to me. It seems to me a life of taking action is a life that has a great chance at being fulfilled to the utmost. Life is synonymous with continual growth. How can something continually grow if there isn't some form of action taking place? Life is not static...it's dynamic!

So here is a thought "to put" some direction to this writing. Confucius said: "To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must cultivate our personal life; and to cultivate our personal life, we must first set our hearts right."

Building off of what Confucius said, here's my take on it. To put your life in order, you must first put your attitude right; to put your attitude right, you must put your thinking in order; to put your thinking in order you must create a positive frame of reference; to put a positive frame of reference around who you are and what you do, you must first listen to what your heart is telling you about what you really want out of your life.

Put some thought to it. But, then you need "to put" some action to your thinking.

Ajar or Closed?

2009-10-06T14:22:00Z

We can define our outlook on life in many different ways. The key is for each of us to know what our outlook is and then deal with it accordingly. Study after study would confirm the key to a full and successful life is being able to look at ourselves in the mirror of our lives with brutal honesty. With that honesty comes the momentum for introducing changes that will create a better life, if need be.

So, is the door to the mirror of your life ajar? In other words, are you open to all of the opportunities that life presents each of us? When you look in the mirror do you see a person with an "open" expression that basically says bring it all on?

Or, is the door to the mirror of your life closed and maybe even locked? Are you the kind that doesn't want to face the truth about yourself so you can define how you can change for the better? Is a "closed" state of mind safe for you? When you look in the mirror do you avoid eye contact with yourself because such contact would make you face the truth about your narrow perspective and attitude?

When the door to eternity closes behind you, there is no mirror on the other side that can help you reflect and change your past. The door of eternity is permanently closed when your life in this world ends. Make sure that your attitude on this side of that door is one of being "ajar." You're "ajar" to all your opportunities in life by being willing to open your mind to the possibilities of those opportunities.

Having a closed minded attitude, narrows your options in life. It creates a mirror image of misery. Open your door and live the mirror image of a person enjoying a life of fulfillment and abundance. This is your only chance as far as we really know for sure.

Time and Life

2009-10-02T13:41:00Z

Time without management is like life without purpose. I ask you: How can you wander through your life without a clearly defined purpose to your future and how can you waste each moment of your life through a lack of managing those moments to their greatest advantage? The answer in my opinion is simple...with one comes the other. And, it can seem like a "chicken or the egg" situation but the fact is both well managed use of your time and a purpose in life are needed for a more fulfilling life.

Purpose in life can be multiple or singular. Some people are driven by a singular focus in their lives while others have a purpose for business success, family success and spiritual success. I won't go so far as to say one is better than the other. Rather, I simply want to emphasize that you have to have a PURPOSE or PURPOSES! Without it or them, you have no direction in your life. Without direction in life, it becomes a wasteland of desolate misery traveling from one oasis to another never finding a way to truly drink from the well of life.

Don't travel...settle! Find something of passion in the important aspects of your life and settle on the idea that you will use the passion to give you direction. Do this:

Write the story of your life. It doesn't have to be in copious detail. Chunk it into key time frames and write your story. Review your story with an eye to circling those things in your life that show recurring interest on your part...things that you love to do. Look for a consistent pattern in those things you circled. It is the pattern that will help you put clarity on what you are truly passionate about.

Having done the above, then allow the engine of your passion to ignite the fuel of your dreams. Build a road map to your dreams. A life plan, if you will, that includes, "why," "what,"(goals), and "how,"(the actions steps you need to take to achieve the goals).

When you have done all of the above, time without management will not be a challenge for you. You will be so driven by the pursuit of your passion that you will choose to manage your time to assure achievement of your dreams. The bottom line is you have to put deadlines on when you want to achieve your various pursuits and manage your time accordingly.

I believe the above thoughts changes the opening sentence to read: Life with purpose results in management of time with urgency. There are no "chicken or the egg" questions in that statement.

Calm After the Storm

2009-09-21T14:27:00Z

We've all been there. A situation befalls us where we absolutely get ourselves into a storm of stress and fretting about something. It can be for the most serious of situations to smallest things. It just happens and we can't seem to do anything about it. We feel totally out of control of our circumstances and get our gut churning about it.

Case in point. I used to get that way over any circumstance that would be new to me. It could involve meeting somebody new or going to a meeting where I was unfamiliar with the people involved or felt I didn't have the knowledge necessary to make a contribution. In short, it could happen for lots of situations and the effect was highly stressful and sometimes even immobilizing. These would turn into stormy times psychologically and all I wanted to do was find a state of calm. My bet is it's happened to many of you, too.

Interestingly, even in the worst of circumstances there always came a calm after the storm. Sometimes it was due to the passage of time. Sometimes it was due to an action someone else took. Whatever. The point is the calm always returned.

There's a lesson in that fact. The lesson is embodied in the answer to the question: Why get ourselves in such a stormy psychological state in the first place?

Case in point, again. I do a lot of traveling in my business. I'm in and out of airports, hotels, taxis, etc. multiple times many weeks of the year. It used to be I could get myself in a total state of panic if things didn't go the way they were supposed to. It could have been a flight delay potentially resulting in a missed connection, or whatever. Whenever interruptions in the planned itinerary would occur I could quickly build up a stormy state of mind. I would feel out of control and could conjure up worst case scenarios of every description.

It happened to me just this past week. I was scheduled on a flight out of Boston with a connection out of Atlanta to my home airport. Yup...the flight out of Boston is delayed an hour and the chances of getting to Atlanta in time to catch my connection were very limited. In the old days, I would have worked myself into a stormy frenzy of anxiety. This would be true even though it was something over which I had little or no control.

Here's the bottom line on all this. I didn't react to the situation in Boston last week with great angst. I've learned over time that it is better to exercise mind over matter in these kinds of situations. Don't worry about but work on things you can control. Airline scheduling and delays is not something any of us can control so why worry about it. Why get into a stormy state of anxiety?

Experience has taught me there is always a calm after the storm. Since that is the case, I've learned to mentally manage my worst of circumstances with a state of calm before the storm has a chance to blowup. You can do that, too. It makes life a whole lot easier.

By the way, the stormy weather in Atlanta delayed my connecting flight so I made my connection. It was very calming!

Surviving Cancer...Living Life

2009-09-15T13:08:00Z

All of us are at risk and many of us contract it while more and more of us survive it. Cancer, that is. That said, none of us survive life, as far as anyone can be absolutely certain. By the way, that previous statement doesn't take away anything from the spiritual side of life and the beliefs it may generate for many of us. Rather, I'm talking about the biological side of life and the fact that none of us survive it.

But, back to cancer and its relevance to the point of this article. There's no doubt a diagnosis of cancer is a devastating event in many lives. I know from where I speak because I received such a diagnosis on April, 23, 2008. On May 7, 2008, I had surgery to remove the tumor and subsequent to that radiation therapy to maximize the odds of my survival from a very aggressive form of cancer. To date, I'm a survivor and everyday the odds turn more in my favor. But, there are no guarantees so you live with it but not dwell on it.

Here's the point, if we're going to maximize living the experience of life. Whether it's the scourge of cancer, other diseases, an automobile wreck, or whatever, living life requires an attitude of accepting the risks as part of it. Life is not a comfort zone. In a way, it's a war zone. A daily war to overcome the challenges and take advantage of the opportunities. It's meant to be lived to the fullest not attempting to avoid the risks of it.

When negative stuff happens, it's up to each of us not to dwell on it but create an attitude of surviving it. Figure it out and make the negative another experience that can be leveraged to the positive side of the ledger of life. As long as there is life, there is hope. When there is hope, there is life to be lived.

None of us can survive life, as we know it, but we certainly can live it to the fullest. Join me, won't you?